Being Loud is Good

From a young age we are conditioned to be “good.” Don’t make waves, don’t use your voice, be as still and as quiet as possible. Except, sometimes we need to do the exact opposite and in those moments we may second-guess ourselves. Because being “loud” can be comparable to being “bad.”

When was a time that you put yourself in the way of harm because you did not realize you could use your voice or speak your truth? As I sat on the floor of my healing studio creating art and doing some inner emotional healing, I remembered a time in my life as a child, being in a traumatic situation, where I felt as though I had no power. I felt as though standing up for myself was the wrong thing to do, because I did not know any better. I forgive myself for not knowing, for being scared. It has taken decades to work through some traumas, including this one, and still I am not quite there.

Somewhere along the way we have forgotten the power of our voice, and the power of saying “no.” It spills over into being “good” for the comfort of others. There have been times where I felt stifled with my expression because I knew that my voice would make people around me uncomfortable. My boundaries were violated and I had to choose between appeasing others or being the “bad guy.”

Don’t get me wrong, the Italian Jersey Girl in me has had many angry outbursts and moments of quick defense over the years. After time, I was led to believe that this aspect of myself was “wrong.” Members of the spiritual community would contribute to this notion, as though everything has to be light and fluffy. Except, that is not who I am. That is not who any of us are all of the time. We are allowed to be loud, to speak up, to have a voice and it doesn’t always have to be “good” or “nice.” It has been a long unraveling process to remove these limitations and get back to my original spark. Transmuting anger is a significant aspect of the healing process that I will be diving into with you soon.

It has come to the point where I will no longer stay silent. My voice is powerful, and my truth is meant to be shared. Putting your needs first is not selfish - it is an act of self-love and self-care. I have found on this healing journey that nurturing and being compassionate to myself is crucial to moving forward. In order to offer services to others, I must also serve myself.

When was the last time that you took some time to yourself? That you sat in stillness with yourself? When was the last time that you said “no” to something that you really did not want to do? When was the last time that you allowed yourself to cry or scream? Let your voice be heard. This is how you start - by showing yourself love and care.

I have created some journal prompts for you to reflect on:

I have also created a few affirmations for you to work with:

And as I write this blog, I am being reminded by a spirit guide to share that many times past life and ancestral trauma also adds to these feelings of inner conflict we may experience when it comes to speaking up and standing our ground. There is often much to unpack on the journey of healing. If you are looking to work through old hurts, unknown wounds and reconnect to your Higher Self, my sessions will help walk you through this part of the journey.